#105 What if time doesn’t heal betrayal—and awareness does?

Your “stress” might have a name—betrayal—and a roadmap out. We sit down with Dr. Debi Silber, founder of The PBT Institute, to unpack why betrayal is unlike any other trauma and how a clear, five-stage process can move you from shock to a stronger, wiser self. Debi shares the research behind post-betrayal syndrome—those stubborn triggers, sleep issues, gut problems, and trust wounds that linger for years—and explains why time alone doesn’t close this chapter. You’ll hear the stats that stop you in your tracks and the mindset shifts that get you moving again.

We trace the journey from discovery day to survival mode, then through the crucial pivot into a “new normal” where you start setting boundaries, dropping what no longer fits, and choosing relationships that match your standards. Debi makes the trap of Stage Three unmistakable: it feels better than chaos, so you camp there, collecting sympathy and repeating your story. The way out is willingness. When you choose progress over familiarity, you turn down the stress response and open space for real change. By Stage Five, your body has energy for self-care, your mind runs on healthier rules, and trust in yourself becomes the foundation for trusting others wisely.

Debi also details support at The PBT Institute for betrayed partners, betrayers ready to change, and practitioners seeking certification to guide clients through predictable transformation. If you’ve wondered why you still feel stuck—why triggers hijack your day or why walls won’t drop—this conversation gives you language, structure, and hope you can use today. Subscribe, share with a friend who needs it, and leave a review to help more people find their way from survival to renewal.

Chapters

• 0:00 Welcome & Guest Introduction
• 0:34 Why Betrayal Isn’t “Just Stress”
• 0:58 Debbie’s Story: Family and Marital Betrayal
• 2:03 Three Discoveries That Changed Everything
• 2:28 Discovery One: A Unique Trauma
• 2:54 Discovery Two: Post-Betrayal Syndrome
• 4:17 Discovery Three: Five Predictable Stages
• 5:09 The Stats Behind Betrayal Symptoms
• 8:28 Stage One to Three: Shock to Survival
• 11:04 The Trap of Stage Three
• 13:20 Moving to Stage Four: New Normal
• 15:21 Stage Five: Healing and Rebirth
• 16:11 Can Everyone Reach Stage Five?
• 16:37 Programs at The PBT Institute
• 18:12 Why Willingness Beats Time